voice ||

[rrrrangerrick]

Look. I'm just gonna go ahead and say it. But I'm only sayin' it once, and I'm gonna say it real slow, so all of you better clean the crap outta your ears and listen up.

I get that there ain't no money. Actual money. But what I'm sayin' is, if you ain't got nothin' to trade, why the hell would you go around wasting somebody's time.

Like, it's like common friggin' decency to bring with you what you got to trade. No, 'oh, whoops guess I left it at home', no, 'oh, it's in the pocket of my other crappy shapeless pants'-- gettin' it to me in a day ain't an option, I don't care if it's your laundry day, if you're waitin' for some big payoff, I don't care if you got twelve kids--that's your own damn fault--I don't care if you're fresh outta the tube. If you wanna buy something from someone? If you bring in your crappy little console, and you want it fixed up real quick so you can get your ass back to work, and you hustle me along and talk real big and then when it comes time to pay up, and you give me some sad sack story? [SLOWLY AND LOUDLY:] I don't work for free. Nobody here better be workin' for free, and if they are, congratulations, you found yourself a sucker. Charity is for suckers.

Okay? Are we clear? 'Cause the next idiot that comes to me askin' for a handout is gonna get it, and I don't mean free frickin' labor. [SIGH.] Jeez. It's like nobody got a brain. Workin' with a buncha stupid fleshy kids. Hardly even seems worth it...

[grumbling trails off into nothing.]

Comments

audio;

[boffing]

It's like your taking the small print and blowing it up. In audio, too, [William says.] That's really helpful.

What is it you've got for trade?

audio;

[rrrrangerrick]

Thanks. [Or something.] Wasn't going for helpful, but thanks. And this ain't no advertisement either, this is a warning. I'm real tired of people wasting my time.

[A beat. And then he sighs. Unseen, he's rubbing his temples.]

Tech. I do tech. Rebuilds, mods, stuff from scratch... blah blah. You name it, I do it. Or I would. If it was worth doing, which it barely is around here.

[boffing]

Oh, you're welcome, [William answers benignly. It's not so often that he talks to someone who's rubbing their temples for reasons other than himself, so he might as well enjoy it.] Any rate, it sounds like you're doing good work but you ain't getting paid.

Have you considered hiring some muscle?

voice;

[retrofire]

[ Things that are weirdly familiar: this guy's voice, yelling, loudly. ]

You ever worked for an IOU?

voice;

[rrrrangerrick]

Do I ever work--

Ask me that again. Go ahead. Ask me.

voice; lmfao jesus i'm already distracted by the hot icons

[retrofire]

Have you ever worked for an IOU.

[ VERY. SLOWLY. and helpfully (not). ]

audio;

[goesdown]

It does sound like they were trying to rip you off.

[ Probably. Mostly, Crowley just wants to press his buttons, though. ]

audio;

[rrrrangerrick]

You got no idea. And what's worse is, they just don't stop! You tell them no, and it's like that encourages them, like they're gonna wear me down. They're not.

But no-ooo, don't matter. They just keep goin' on, and on, with the sob stories.

audio;

[goesdown]

People used to try to do that to me in my old business.

[ Oh, no. Please let me keep my soul. Pathetic. ]

No one's tried in my current one yet, though. Meanwhile, honest men like you and I work for a living.

[echopraxia]

What service is you provide.

( the lack of a question mark is not a typographical issue but rather an equal lack of inflection. anya isn't after anything in particular so much as her interest is twigged and she wants to prod him with a stick to see if there's anything else interesting, or if the speed of his speech might just be useful to practise grasping english. )

[rrrrangerrick]

[He'll find some way to mention the tell-tale lack of inflection (accent? whatever) later, right now he just

sighs.]

Answer service. You ask a question, I give an answer. Tech, I do tech. Mods, rebuilds, whatever. I feel like I already said this. Did I already say this? Oh, yeah. I did.

voice.

[dissent]

"For suckers".

voice.

[rrrrangerrick]

Don't tell me I gotta explain what a sucker is.

If you're askin'? You probably are one.

voice

[rathercommon]

Oh, I don't know about all that.

[ Her voice is perfectly sweet. ]

After all, if you show someone a bit of kindness now, they might show a bit to you later on, when you're in bad circumstances. Or they'll show it to someone else. Really, charity spreads a bit of goodwill, I'd say, and that's worth it, isn't it?

voice

[rrrrangerrick]

Uh-huh.

Hey, hold your communicator up to your ear, sweetheart, would you?

voice

[forcemageure]

Goodness, keep that level of excitement up and you'll rupture something. Although if you did need to pay a doctor I suppose you'd be subsidizing the economy! So on second thought maybe there's a silver lining.

voice

[rrrrangerrick]

Economy? What economy? All you got is a bunch of jackasses passing around the same blankets and sweaters and callin' it a trade. It's pathetic. It's annoying. It makes it so nobody wants to pay for anything.

So where's your friggin silver lining now, huh?

stubbornly texts;

[lostsoldier]

robotics?

raccoon paw texting;

[rrrrangerrick]

Not unless you got something real good to trade, pal.

voice

[alsohawkeye]

You know it kind of sounds like you're the one who's a sucker.

[ what he's funny when he rants ]

voice

[rrrrangerrick]

[yes everyone's laughing]

Really. And do you mind tellin' me just how you figured that one, huh, 'cause-- I ain't seein' it.

audio; shows up a week late

[hacker]

[ wow son. dryly and indirectly critical, Skye blurts out her assessment: ] In case anyone thought the bleak post-apocalypse would build character or bring out the gentler parts of human nature via commiseration, we have exhibit A. Proving it wildly and naively optimistic.

audio; perfect timing tbh

[rrrrangerrick]

[Sharply:] Hey hey hey hey. I'm not anyone's exhibit anything, lady.

[check your life-as-a-non-experiment-privilege yo except... 1) that chapter of his life wasn't really real so is he allowed to get offended over it anymore, and, 2) they were all sort of someone's experiments, weren't they.

so. yeah.]

And I got plentya character. You wanna know how I describe my character? Not wanting to get friggin' cheated outta everything I got.

[text]

[r4bb1t]

you have no idea how much easier your life can be when you stop worrying about that shit

bring somebody's kid back from the brink without asking for anything? free food from that person, forever

not that goopy protein junk, either

ask no questions when folks come to you after some obviously shady stuff will get you not only gratitude, but information when they know they can trust you, which is always worth its weight in gold

figuratively speaking

a good reputation pays for itself

but sure i got plenty of shit you won't find much outside irkalla if you're married to the idea of commerce

[text]

[rrrrangerrick]

[Yeah yeah yeah except no, also known as, Rocket quickly and dismissively skims all of that and dismisses it until he gets to the good part--]

Plenty of shit like what. What're we talking here.